inner mother

I feel often my "inner mother",

a voice who said again and again,

"it is not good enough".

Everything what I am doing could be better.

After every work, some other work what I could do is popping up in my mind.

critic

pressure

voice who knows much more than me what is better.

after years of work

I can use my critical voices more useful for me

and get more creative information through it.

but sometimes I wish

"please, just be quiet!"

it is enough.

I need more acceptance for what I am doing.

Please mom, say first

"good job!"

than,

you can tell me the next thing.

So I work and work and work hard

more and more,

try to be better

and still have the feeling

" I did nothing".

my inner mother is ancered so deeply inside me.

even I am sitting alone,

I am with my inner mother.

to stop this,

the silent meditation was too silent,

there was too much space for my inner mother's voice.

OSHO's meditation was helpful

it brought me out from this spiral

my body was more busy for shaking and dancing and screaming

after that, the silent arrived.

finally, I could feel peace.

and me?

as a mother?

I realize the inner mother in my son

more and more

this is me and this is not me.

I wish so much to avoid creating more inner mother inside my son but it is so difficult

and how can I stop it before I get free from mine??